In order to properly appreciate this blog post, you'll need the appropriate background music. "Rivers and Roads" by The Head and The Heart should set the tone quite nicely. I'll wait while you grab a another cup of coffee and settle in. Take your time.
Since you brought it up, let's talk about time. Specifically, the times and how they're changing. Side bar: I've noticed that I'm most receptive to words of wisdom when in a heightened state of vulnerability, but I'm sure that is true of everyone. We never heed advice when we feel invincible, because our invincibility brings with it infinite knowledge and understanding. Anyway...
"Time is life. Time is the most precious, invisible asset we have. Money will come back, anytime. A 100 times or more, money will come back. But time never comes back." - Humans of New York: The Series, Episode 1.
Have your eyes rolled back in to your cranium yet? Give it time.
After 3 and 1/2 years with my roommate in our lovely 2 bedroom condo in the bad part of town, I've moved. Now I am sans roommate, sans 500 sq ft, and (silver lining) sans sketchy neighborhood. As adventurous and independent as I pretend to be, I am a creature who's foundation rests in routine and consistency.
I feel like time has passed so quickly while simultaneously standing still. I relive all the moments and memories in vivid color, like I'm still in them but only as an observant bystander. Allow me to clarify, my roommate did not die nor did we part ways on disagreeable terms. Our lives split in two different directions professionally, which subsequently led to our lives splitting in two different directions geographically, and the clinger in me just wasn't ready for it.
"But time never comes back."
I wouldn't change a thing. I don't feel as though I took the last 3 years of time for granted. I just wanted to linger a little longer in my particular form domestic bliss.
Change is a funny thing. Am I really upset that my roommate moved away? Certainly. But is that what is really driving this overly dramatic personal narrative? That would just be too easy.
Change begets change. Even though I just finished hauling the truckloads of my belongings to my new living quarters, I know that this is still only the beginning. Closing the door on apartment #403 meant closing the door on that chapter of my life. During that time I always knew what was coming next, I'd turn pages but nothing was ever a big surprise.
Now I attempt to peek at the pages ahead and find them blank, unknown and unwritten. What will the new chapter hold? I am not much for surprises... But alas, here we are heading down the path of uncertainty starting the first real day in my new apartment armed with a cup of cold coffee and an exorbitant number of hoodies...how did I accumulate SO MANY hoodies???
"Darn the wheel of the world! Why must it continually turn over?"- Jack London.